We reached the pacific ocean a few days agao. Technically it was just an inlet but seeing the water was extremely emotional all the same. I truly knew that I was going to finish this trip not matter what but realistically I knew the obstacles that could present themselves and get in my way and I never once thought I was invincible. I do think I am sometimes. I made it though and, yes, I teared up knowing that I did this. This trip was one of my greatest desires to complete, just to see what I am capable of and what my limits are. Personally I don’t want to set any limits and I don’t necessarily know if I’ve found any yet haha. It was amazing to take my shoes off and walk into the water, dip my bike into the inlet and lift it over my head (something I had been working on since the last time I attempted to do that…dropped the bike on my head after a mountain climb : ) )

It’s just amazing that today is August 1 and that in 3 days I will be seeing my dad in Seattle and getting ready to fly out with him on Saturday. There is so much right now that I am looking forward to seeing (and eating..cough cough STEAK cough cough) at home, things that I have taken for granted for most of my life. I am also looking forward to maintaining contact with the people I connected to on this trip and keeping those friendships with me.

It has been a hard journey at times, especially now. It’s the end and everyone is eager to get home to normal life (might I throw in there what exactly is normal?) but David C. who managed to come see us made a good point. Our commitment to this ride is like marriage: at first we all agree with each other and get along and find that thrill in something new and exciting. As time goes on we start to find flaws and things that we don’t necessarily agree with or like and are presented with a challenge, even question why we’re still doing this. When we signed up for the 4k, we agreed to commit ourselves to each other, the team and the mission and we can’t loose that just because we are starting to “check out.” We are not breaking up, and we need to see this through until the big ride into Seattle and leave on a positive note in order to keep the relationships we have built. Like a marriage, we will not always be happy or get along or agree, but in working together to compromise and sort out our differences we will essentnially build a stronger bond. We need to see that we all did this together and we will share this experience for the rest of our lives. I am so happy that I was able to complete this trip, inspire so many people that I met along the way and can honestly say that I want to stay in touch with the friends I have made here.

I also want to say thank you to all who have been supportive of me and made this trip a reality and hope that those who I have dedicated my rides to know that every mile was for them, to encourage them to keep on going.  I could not have done this alone.

0being covered in bike grease

0chaffing until I bleed

0eating 3-5 peanut butter and jelly sandwiches a day just for snacks

0eating a second breakfast less than an hour after the first

0thinking pasta, beans, suddenly salad and anything else available all mixed together is the most delicious creation simply because it  can be eaten and is all that’s available

0shopping for team food at 3am before a 5am rise

0packing 30 duffel bags, 30 sleeping pads and bags on top of a huge van each morning

0sink showers and sink laundry

0living for finding the next gas station

0thinking that 70 miles of biking is a short day and being excited that we’ll get in early and be able to relax

So, so much more. I can’t wait to come back with stories. Going to bed now.

This morning was worse for me than yesterday. I finally broke down when the valve fell off my tire in the morning right as I was trying to finish getting ready to head out for the day. I had to sit out for the last 60 miles yesterday because I destroyed my knee on the hills early and started out the day feeling pretty awful. I’m glad I did though and was able to ice the knee and get ready to finish up these last few days. This is it. As I was saying though it’s getting harder and harder to keep going. We roll into hosts late, rush through dinner, maybe get a shower but I’ve found that sometimes I’m too tired to get myself to do that. The others feel the same way. Then we get up early for another long day. Repeat.

I rode for my brother today. Keeping him in mind, I knew, would be the only thing to keep me going. There is so much here that I just do not want to deal with anymore and so much at home that I want back. I am going to do this of course but I’m definitely fighting at this point. I know everyone and every reason I’m doing this deserves me to be in the highest spirits possible through the last couple days. I will do it.

My team mates were amazing today with getting me through the 90 mile ride. Abo changed my tire this morning as I was just balling my eyes out like a baby. It was such a small gesture but huge for me..I can’t even release my tire with levers because I have no upper body strength. Totally embarrassing so I’m glad he jumped in to fix the problem. My ride group was amazing as well in boosting my mood. In fact Katie dedicated her ride to me. That meant a lot. She’s a doll. The others were all really supportive too in keeping me positive and motivated.

I finished the ride. I just finished dinner. It’s 10 o’ clock and I’m getting ready for bed…just giving my followers something to read so they can stay updated. Only 80 miles tomorrow, but there’s a mountain to climb so it’s going to be rough. Especially since we’ve had back to back 90 mile days this week and we’ve heard from locals that the winds are intense. This is when it counts the most. We’ve got to make a strong finish.

Yesterday we had a short, 45 mile day out of Glacier and in to Kalispell. “Easy” was not really the word for it. We woke up to a downpour that kept us all wet and chilly as we tried to pack the vans and take down tents. It was hard to be in good spirits at that point. I woke up feeling really sick. I went to bed feeling sick too. I dedicated the ride yesterday to Haley Walsh, a 1-year old daughter of a family friend who went into surgery for a tumor on the 21st. It was the hardest 45 miles I have had to ride on this trip so far. For some reason I just wasn’t feeling it and it was hard to keep going. I think it was a reality check though, that it was so hard. I kept going for Haley though and I hope that keeping her in my thoughts helped her and her family through this tough time.

Today on the other hand was a beautiful 90 mile ride into Libby. We will be moving on to Idaho tomorrow! I rode for Haley again today because I wanted her to have two days dedicated to her, especially since I wasn’t in my best spirits yesterday.

I’m so excited to see my family soon. I think this trip will have a perfect, natural culmination and I will honestly say that I am ready to reach Seattle, go home, and figure out what is next.

Thank you everyone who has helped me raise the funds and provided me with the support I needed to make this trip possible. I have loved riding for someone each day and I hope my dedication and motivation to keep going even when it’s cold, or raining, or uphill, or on gravel, or into a storm, or against the wind, or, which is more likely the case…all of the above, will inspire them to hold on and keep fighting.

*cool breezes and shade when it’s over 100

*warm weather after being stuck in the cold and hailstorms for 2 days

*tailwinds

*cold water

*showers

*laundry

*descents

*completing a big climb

*any place to lie down

*any kind of food available

*stretching

*smooth pavement

*gas stations

What I got out of this ride, however, definitely tied together the challenges of this trip and the parallel challenges that cancer brings. You never know what to expect, parts of the journey are going to be excruciatingly painful both emotionally and physically. Some parts will be easy, like riding downhill with a tail wind and some will be more like riding uphill on gravel for miles.

Today was hard. But I am so happy for finishing the ride. Maybe it will make the other obstacles I encounter less daunting. I feel that if I made it through this, I can make it through a lot more than I thought.

Finally did laundry today! Can’t wait to bike in a clean jersey : )

I can’t believe we only have about 18 days left.

Our days off in Yellowstone were rough but still exciting. We were stuck in 3 hailstorms and it rained most of the time we camped. The nights were absolutely freezing and got me thinking about how I am going to handle the even colder weather in Glacier soon. We were able to layer up to a point but of course, I was still pretty cold.

I find it amazing that we only have 21 days left. I feel like I just started. I am starting to get a little homesick though. I’ve been kind of emotional this week for various reasons I know people back home would understand and it’s hard to find that same support here. My team is wonderful and has helped me out immensely, but I still have that pull toward my friends on the east coast. I am still loving every day and don’t wish to be anywhere else, but I am also happy that I will have something else to look forward to after August 4th. I can’t wait to see what the next few weeks will bring : )

At the summit there was a boy on top named Micah who was a cancer survivor who was on a Make a Wish trip. I thought that it was so cool that he was there the day we made that  climb and was able to get a picture with us. His face just lit up as he talked to us and I thought that was pretty neat to see us making an impact then and there.

The climb itself was hard, but so beautiful. I didn’t stop for more than 10 minutes the whole way. I just got into my rhythm and kept moving forward. I just can’t believe sometimes that I’m doing this and it is the rewarding feeling of a climb like that, that I live for. I’ve been going through some rough emotions and this ride is what I needed.

107 miles tomorrow. Can’t wait.

We anticipated a 99 mile day into the black hills in temperatures over 100 degrees. We went through the badlands and the scenery was great. We stopped at the one store on the highway we were on and I got a $40 dollar donation from the owner. He seemed really interested in our cause. I love when I meet people who show such an appreciation for what we’re doing. The ride itself was definitely hard and miles 60 – 80 were what I had the most trouble with as usual. Unfortunately we had to finish the last 20 miles by shuttle due to thunderstorms and lightning. We arrived at our campground and had a cook out for the fourth. Today, the 5th, we had off to rest and get ready for a tough trip through the Black Hills, the Rockies, and the Cascades. I’m really getting scared anticipating the rest of the trip ane I’m trying to figure out exactly how to prepare for it and keep my motivation going. Any inspiring words would be great right now haha. Again, I am still so happy to be continuing this trip regardless of the obstacles but I will quote myself from yestserday by saying that “by the time August 4th comes I’ll be ready to throw my bike into the pacific ocean and go home.”

On another note I visited a family friend, Dallas, in Keystone today. We met him the first time the family drove cross country when me and my brother were younger. He has a truly inpspiring story and seeing him today definitely helped me maintain the desire to keep going. It’s funny how you connect to ceartain people and our family has definitely connected to Dallas.

I have my group of six that I will be leaving the city with tomorrow and on our training ride today a woman asked us what group we were a part of. We told her about the 4k and immediately disclosed to us that she was a cancer survivor…who works at JHU. Such a small world. Tomorrow our team of 6, originally Team C: Seattle, will be departing as team Jan Danforth. Our ride tomorrow will be for the woman we met today.